I have abso-fucking-lutely no bloody idea how these stupid bankers can actually call the helpdesk and ask for a step-by-step-(please)-guide-(me-along-with-this) to submit their expense claims. And you call yourself a graduate, when you can't even be bothered to attend the fucking training before you call and ask rubbish questions that can be found on the reference guide? (if you actually bothered to get your big fat ass off the chair in the first place?!)
I'm so fucking peeved right now. Makes me wonder how did they manage to land a job in a bank. Stupid shitheads. You know.. the kinda questions they have are like,

Caller: I have an invalid corp code red flag. How?
Me: Go to "My Info" and fill it up with the new 10 digit one.
Caller: Where is "My Info"? I can't find.

Fuck you la.. it's not even a valid question to ask. How am I supposed to answer that when it's staring blatantly in your face? Like what, "oh.. it's 3cm below the top right hand corner of your screen with a man picture"????

Or you get questions like;

Caller: I keep getting directed to another portal!
Me: Close all your browsers and open just one, then type in the website I'm gonna give you. *proceed to read to him the URL*
and before I could even finish reading, this rude man cuts in and shouts
Caller: I DON'T KNOW WHERE IS IT!!!

Well fucker, if you could just calm down and listen up instead of acting like the whole world owes you a big favour, then maybe you can FIND IT.

The best call I got so far was from the lady secretary.

Caller: I'm a delegate for my supervisor and I get the red flag saying he is an approver only and cannot submit expense claims for himself. What's the meaning of this..
Me: I guess VPU side hasn't updated his profile after Singapore went live. But you have to wait till tomorrow before u can submit the report cos Global would take some time.
Caller: WHAT??!! I spoke to Richard (some senior staff) about this last week and he promised to settle this problem immediately! Do you want me to speak to Derek Monkman (my manager) about this? I know him and I see him everyday. *continues to shout and rant about that Richard guy and how irresponsible he is, and that she's gonna raise this up to the CFO*
Me: I'm sorry but I can't do anything about this.
Caller: Let me speak to Richard!
Me: He's not in today.
Caller: Can you put me through to a more senior staff? Not that I wanna bypass you but because if you are acting as the middle person, no one will know the seriousness of this case and this can't do.. you know what I mean? If my manager has to incur some interest-rate charges due to the wait, I'm gonna be in deep shit.


Well, it's not really my fault if you chose to do this till the last minute right? And in anycase, I do hope you get into deep shit for deafening my eardrums and for being plain unreasonable.

All of them ought to be sent for some anger management course. And because I can't shout back at them, telling them to fuck off and get a life, I have to supress my own anger in the office. Guess who gets my shit at the end of the day? Kenny does. x(