Ben Ong: If you are reading this, this is to let you know that we are all very disappointed in the way you're handling the situation. You don't just tell her you want to end the whole thing without telling her the reason for doing so. Do you know how terrible the poor girl is feeling now? Do you even bother in the first place?? CALL her up and clear up all the misunderstandings. Not sms..
You seriously suck more than i thought you did. I'm sure that she'll pull thru this ordeal. In fact, i'm certain enough that she's better off without someone like you.
Mass pe today nearly killed me. My physical conditioning is atrocious. I can't even do 10 full sit ups without stopping and my arms are fuckin weak. Wouldn't bother going into the push ups.The only thing i seem to be achieving after 1+ year of mass pe is huger calves. No point lamenting aye?!
School was good today! Ended school super early, didn't sleep during ANY of the lessons despite going to bed only at 2am!!! Gp should be taught like today, everyday!!!
Trip down to town was even more hilarious when daph was being silly again... Too bad bf caught me in action... what a spoiler... sorry dear!!! you know i love u the most!!!
Caught a movie i thought i'll never watch; Magic Kitchen. ahhaha... no storyliner, just a movie to oggle at Sammi Cheng and Maggie Q and for the lameass F4 fans, Jerry Yen. Is that his name? I honestly have no idea.. but yeah.. we had free tix thanks to mo dearest!!! so decided to catch any movie... Headed to Spotlight after the movie. Seriously, it never occured to me that Spotlight would be so fun!!! I learn smth new everyday. Took loads of stupid pix with Steffie's phone, laughing like crazy, choosing ribbons for 30 mins... Urgh... but it was fun!!!
Fun aside, should really get down to serious studying.. The number of tests are beyond my ability to count with my 10 fingers... I hate the A's. What's worse? To come back on a saturday to sit for an exam... Goddamnit.

*Living a single life? Be thankful

Thy, have found more reasons not to go to school.
1) Getting burnt by the fuckin hot test tubes isn't fun at all.. Now, there's this big blue black gross colour right on my thumb, strategically on my vein.
2) The damn school doesn't even provide a first aid kit. What if some CONCENTRATED chemicals get onto my skin? Is the stupid teacher just gonna tell me to " put your hand under running water to cool the skin"??
3) The new chem lecturer aka Kao Bei Ong, thinks he's the funniest man on earth, trying to crack lame ass jokes which are TOTALLY not funny at all, really turns me off.. So here they are, scolding us for wasting time during lectures, and then they themselves are wasting OUR time.. plus, he speaks like a machine gun.. like, "acidsareprotondonersandbasesareprotonacceptors" bf, we found someone who can do faster speed talking than us... so jian.
4) No idea what's going on during chem lecture.
5) No idea what's going on during econs lecture.
6) School food really sucks to the core.
7) I keep falling asleep during tutorials until the point whereby i was supposed to copy down the answers for chemistry via dictation, and i was half dreaming. Know what i wrote when i finally came to my full senses? Under the observation column for QA, i wrote "cine", did a little doodling of something i can't make out. Not funny here but i really burst out laughing after that..... So embarrasing... I was dreaming u see...
8) Guys are ugly, girls are ugly

I really detest school la... The only thing i enjoy doing is to PDA with my mo and bf.. love you 2 to a trillion bits!!! I'm getting outta here... just felt a surge of determination to revise chemistry...

*Uh-huh
can't think of anything now.. so brain dead...

Busy busy week i must say. Lemme do a lil recap on what happened on sunday. The day was way too fantastic.
Woke up early and got my ass outta the house. x) 10 of my super enthusiastic classmates headed for our class escapade; to the teachers' place. The train ride was utterly horrible!!! Imagining travelling from Buona Vista all the way to Bishan?! I admit that i'm soo not an East-lander... Had loads and loads of fun, pigging out that Khoo's place and then at Chua's and lastly, to Chiam's... totally had a affinity with the number 55. My house number and the buses that we took the whole day were nothing but 55. tsk tsk... Must really take my hat off to Khoo and Chua's wife's cooking.. the delicacies were fantastic!!! I'm so gonna go visiting when the class organises another outing.. ahhaha. Whilst at the place, i finally started gambling. Yes. I'm a good girl and yesterday was the first time i started gambling.. hur hur... not bad for a first timer... won $2. I know it isn't alot and i wouldn't dare to place big stakes... as the chinese saying goes , " shi du, jiu shu" aka you gamble 10 times, you'll lose at least 9 times... hahha.. what a lousy translation.. you get the gist right?
Today, was supposed to get my dunks... What a fuckin let down.. They ran out of sizes... New models coming in next week but it's the so called school girl cum valentine edition. OKAY, can so foresee cheesiness installed for me.. No thanks but i think i'll just head down to Queensway with the babes again.. No harm anyway.. x)
OH!!!! I saw song kee today!!! Looks way better than last year.. hurhur... looking all smart and cool in the sajc uniform.. i'm so jealous. really! cj's uniform ought to be banned by moe.. fugly design, colour and material... urgh... should continue rambling. its bad. Plus, we made our way to Ikea and had another pigging out session.. hahaha... Clara and I shared 4 pieces of chicken wings and a plate of fries whilst bf and theresa were salivating over their meatballs.. never thought they could make me eat one, but they did... First and last time i'm touching those stuff.. I am a self proclaimed muslim.. hahhaa.. i take halal food.. ask anyone!!! Actually, i only eat white meat; chicken and fish... THATS IT
Girls, i'm not kidding.. I'm bursting outta my skirt... Stupid design. Who the fuck designs skirts like that?! And my tummy refuses to retract itself.. *sulks* I look like some stuffed up toy la! Gross... I'm gonna start on my detox programme. Hopefully? hahhaa.. aiight.. heading outta here.. gonna start on THE MISSION

*Hope, ignored me again

I have a majorly dysfunctional family. Hate it. Hate to put on a facade and agree with each one of them. Guilt has surfaced within me and i don't feel good. I believe strongly in karma and i know for sure, retribution is so gonna get me. It's gonna be so bad that i'd wished i'd never bitched,argued,gossiped in my entire life. She's related to me. Both of them are... I've heard both sides of the story and had my fair share of bitching... am i fuckin hypocritical or what? This is so not me; bitching about the other person in front of the other. Siding whom i think treats me better. It's not helping when the other two gives special treatment towards her and not us.
I know i haven't been well liked as a child and definitely things have not changed much now. The fault has always been lying with us. Although much denial have been going on when we confront them, i know the ultimate truth. We're condemned. Not just amongst the family, but also their friends and relatives.
But who are we to be blamed? At the mere least, we aint no boot lickers. Direct and ruthless with words, we may be. But at least, we portray who we are. Not some two-faced, double standard creature... Or am i?
This year i foresee, is gonna be one helluva mental and emotional rollercoaster. Did i mention that i screwed up my SATs? I might as well withdraw from the A level education since i know that my grades are gonna be mediocre and isn't gonna get me anywhere in life.
Is it just me or does everyone encounter the same problem that i have? Not just abt the dysfucntional part, but also the thing that has been habouring in my mind since the end of time. I've caught myself smiling on more than one occasion when i think about the past. The happy past. But like I said, it was the past. No way to rewind time and even if such a device was made possible, it wouldn't be able to rectify the persisting problem.
Hearing the song playing in the background on sherlyn's blog has caused tears to well up in my eyes. The melody and tune transports me to a pseudo paradise. A paradise that i've created in my mind. Just us, in a vast land filled with colourful wild flowers. The sun shining brightly and the cool breeze blowing. Butterflies would surround us. Towards the other end of the my paradise place, there'll be this magnificent ocean with crystal clear blue water. We'll be holding hands, walking bare footed on the damp sand with waves occasionally rushing up to our ankles. He'll then whisper to me saying," I'll never allow you to shed another tear drop."
I swear only then, will I truly know the meaning of happiness and euphoria.
If i were granted one wish, i'd wish that i was never given life to begin with. Because that little psedo anecdote that i've mentioned earlier on, was never meant to be and will never. He has already said his goodbye. The problem lies with me; I still haven't fully accepted the fact that he's long gone....

*Toying with my inner self

CNY is seriously a fucked up festival minus the collection of money. But then again, some fucktard had the audacity to give me a measly $4. Wtf.. Let me declare first that i'm not a money face. Was never and never will be. But c'mon... i thought the $4 era was like ever so passe? isn't the trend now at least $6? Someone bring me back to reality please?
It's the second day of CNY and my relatives are downstairs doing some major pigging out. It seems quieter than the past few years but i aint complaining. Hur hur... I, on the other hand, am seeking solace in my holiday homework. And i've yet to COMPLETE a full assignment. Econs is half done coz i really have no idea on what's going on so i'll call my friend later to copy. Chemistry assignment is also half done coz i can't find the solutions. argh... and then there's always GP... cloning.. ahh.. how interesting..pls note the sarcasm in my tone. How can the educators or rather the so-called educators, toture our poor souls by giving us tons of assignments during a holiday?! I can really continue lamenting you know?!
Didn't have a proper sleep coz he appeared in my dream.. couldn't remember the explicit details and i rather not either.. too depressing. Am leaving thy keyboard now. I am obliged to eat.

*Take me away with you

Bestest CNY eve... besides the fact that foetus was trying to have her own mini concert on stage.. like get a life already?! that stupid fool really can irritated me to my bones i tell you... i bet she thought peiwen's sarcastic " ni shi wo de ou xiang!!!!" was for real... what a loser... *shrudders*
anw, i was fully recharged after i saw a certain someone... seriously still looking as good as ever!!! wonder if he has already be talent spotted.. it'll definitely be a waste if he hasn't been.. x)... and, i finally got to see the ever so famous Leon Lee. Well, at least amongst the AFs.. he's soooooo cute!!! Vanessa, can i please have his picture??!! I'm really not some psychopath. I'm normal... but he's really cute!!! hahahha
Guys from sji really cmi when it comes to shopping la... they take forever to choose a design, and then take forever to make a decision whether to get it or not, and then they end up choosing some colour meant for girls... wussies.... tsk tsk... it only proves my "sji gay bastards" theory even further.. i swear i aint gonna shop with them ANYMORE... 3 hrs and they haven't bought a single fuck shit...
The celebration at school was unbelievably mundane... but then again, shouldn it be a norm already? Even the highlite of the event; the dance, wasn't as good as last year.... but i have to admit that my dearest mo, amanda and baoli can really dance... simply took my breath away... x)
Kinda dread CNY coz it simply means that once its over, the A's would approach really soon... Sigh... i've ran outta things to say already... will see you guys when sch reopen

*It felt good to touch you....

Absolutely boring day!!! *screams in frustration* Had no idea what was going on during chem lecture and had the audacity to take a nap during chem tutorial... my lifestyle has to go through a major renovation before i fail my A levels and be banished to the 18th story of hell.. hur hur... But then again, i really couldn't help it. Pe has taken its toll on my life.. it always makes me sleepy.. plus hearing Chiam's voice drooning on and on... perfect ambience.. supposed to end like super late but since the science department decided to cancel all practicals for this week, i got let off at 310. Headed to town as usual and didn't leave till 7? It was unusually interesting to hear someone else besides bf doing the speed talking; trina... so it was like 3 ppl talking at some supernatural speed and poor theresa.. trying damn hard to figure out what's going on... Bf, i love spending every single moment with you!! Thousand and trillion kisses going out just for you... [ i hope clara doesnt see this.. x) ]

This can't be happening to me... No way am i feeling this way. Self denial might be the best remedy. No idea how the feeling of elation comes about when i see you around. You simply make my day! I could just fall in love with you...

Aye, this is not about bf. and i'm not cheating on you.. and theresa, if you're still reading this, we're still scandalousing.. that thing above was just a silly doodling.. no hidden meaning. Wanted to clarify it in case ppl thinks that we're indulging in some hard core lesbianism... Well, sorta but not to the extreme... Right bf?! A little this and that won't do much harm, Will it?!
So fuckin not looking forward to school tmr.... i wanna sleep in late before i miss the chance again... Oh Fuck.

*Emotional Fatigue

I've finally caught School of Rock!!! And i know i'm fuckin lagging... but so what? First or last, i still watched it!!! And as its damn suggests, IT ROCKS!
The trip down to town was friggin horrendous.. it was pouring like hell and all of us were drenched to the skin.. now i finally appreciate cj's ugly BLUE uniform; for this rainy season that is. Imagine us clad in ac or sa or any uniform with a white blouse when you're drenched?! x) Oh well, bf and i were SOAKED coz the damn bus took forever to come and hence we couldn't go down to cine. Had to make do with yucky lido... I started getting high for like no apparent reason.. i suspect laughter's my aphrodisiac. "The gurlssss room!!!"; imagine me saying that in a ultra bimbotic tone. Yup.. irritated the shite outta Melvin and bf.. but i was having fun.. for those of you who have cable and watches The Amanda Show, you'd know what i'm talking about.. hahahah
Gonna make this a short one coz i have a ting xie and an econs test tmr( i have no idea what was/is going on). I'm Screwed!!! Someone? Anyone? HELP MEEEEE * waves frantically *

*Being a downright bimbo today

Goddamn fruitful... i've finally completed my probability tutorial after much racking of the brain... ok.. Almost done.. left the last question and a few blanks here and there, which i'm gonna ask Chua BB during the next tutorial... I shall attempt to study Money and Prices tmr... having a stupid test on tuesday and i swear, i'll never get enough of tests this year... every week consists of either tests, ting xie's, gp essays & comprehensions, and zuo wen.. JC life is really nothing but a pile of shit!
If only poly offered my course... I'd be a much much happier person...
hah... was just talking to bf abt some stuff and then the mentioning of memory work came in... and i was just wondering, since i rely soooo much on memory to study, ( i memorised my econs without understanding or knowing how to apply, and sat for the exam. resulted in an O level pass.. hur hur) what would happen if i end up with a concussion??? I'll have to start from the basics... from Express to normal tech, and then to ITE... *shrudders* But i adore my pictorial memory!!!
I feel made use of... to you; go get a back bone coz you're seriously lacking of one... leeching on others to benefit yourself?! C'mon, you're trying far too hard to please your surroundings. Thinking that you're so candy-ass popular? You've over estimated yourself. You have no idea how others perceive you by the way you act. Clad in those clothes, you've just portrayed your cheapness to the entire world.
Shall get back to math. Spent enough time lazing ard.....

*Stop trying to turn me into someone else

Fantastically good day!!! Lemme elaborate

1) Ran 4.2km at MacRitchie... Never thought i'd make it outta the jungle alive. But I did!!! And i'm damn proud to proclaim that all in all, i think i only stopped to walk for about 1km!!! That's SOMETHING ok... x)
It feels good running and sweating and having that shade of pink on my cheeks, not forgetting, shedding some excess fats. Gained it back after that sinful KFC meal.. urgh
2) Met up with Crystle!!! To think that she gained 3kg and still looking good, I'm starting to get really jealous.. So glad to see her once again...
3) Had this major blast of a party at Daph's place.. she taught us a new card game that bf and i have christianed, The Name Game... It's even more fun when Daph's playing it coz she's Daph!!! Was even more surprised when my dad actually allowed me to go, and stay till 1130pm. like whoaaa....
4) PTM went smoothly. My HT sang my praises to my parents and said i'm intelligent... *my toes are really laughing*. Only let down was that he said that i should never wear ankle socks again... ??!! At least he didn't mention anything about my skirt coz i'm sure my dad's gonna fuck me up badly for that.

Okay.. that sums up my day... I'm a happy girl!!!
New reflection of the day: Never trust a guy who's good at sweet talking because there's a 99.99% chance that he's a bastard. So girls, pls rather date a guy who can't express his feelings through words, than to fall head over heels for one that has honey coated over his words.. They seriously suck!

*I love you, boyfriend

Absolutely fantastic... changed my blogskin to a real cheesy-assed one and i can't view it... the screen is either showing the lesbian one that i chose earlier on, but decided not to use it, or the black gothic lady who is starting to freak me out... i want to view my forbidden loveee!!!!! like NOW NOW NOW
School was bloody crap... instead of going on the familiarisation run with the AFs, i was stuck in class, writing some nonsensical gp essay titled " A sound knowledge of science and technology is essential for a well educated person in today's society. Do you agree?" Ended up writing and rushing through the conclusion, and obviously, my essay isn't coherent and i'm prepared to fail... urgh.... some emotional booster eh?! Then there was double chinese and in stored for me was a whole exercise comprising everything from the paper 2 segment... Life sucks... I'd rather be running and dying and whining and complaining and walking in the jungle with them. I won't even mind bf or theresa scolding me for being such a whiney. I won't even mind the damn mosquitoes and the lack of water!!! I hate being stuck in school doing mundane stuff!
Plus, it didn't help much when there was this fight going on b/w some ppl and swanny didn't even offer me the invitation to come see the spectacular show!!!! I wanna see a real fight!!!
Because of this, i've come to a conclusion; GUYS ARE VERY VERY CHILDISH. Eager to know what started the fight? Some guy apparently threw the other guy's banana up the roof... laugh till your balls drop and roll away please... i mean like wtf? and they ended up chasing each other till the thrower had to lock himself in his class with 1/4 of his class, leaving a few others stranded outside... and when they tried to let everyone come in for the 2nd time, the banana eater managed to force his way into the class, and punched up the thrower's accomplice, who was totally innocent.. so yeah.. that started a new fight; b/w accomplice and banana eater. The outcome? A poor guy being punched up, the lock of the classroom was spoilt and the banana was left on top of the roof... God knows where which part of cjc is the banana lying on now.. Seriously, guys are retarded fucktards...

*Blithe

Before i proceed, Happy 18th Birthday to Guoyi!!!
There's zilch possibility that he'll chance upon this entry coz for starters, his email account is flooded... stupid cow...
I've never felt like i've worked out my arms as much as today. Volleyball was incredible... all in all, i think i did about 700 digs and i'm surprised that no blue-blacks are appearing on my arms.. no sores, no pain... no nothing... damnit... went through 3 selections for nothing... tmd... not that i was eager... and i felt kinda bad for veron so steph and i played shite... expected some good tan but came home as yellow as ever... with the exception of dirt on my arms. Wenqi said i became darker.. Right. I've scubbed off the dust and dirt from the ball, and i'm now shining... x)
Aint gonna ramble anymore...
I'm bored, I'm outta here...

*All I got from you today was an ultimate feeling of emptiness...

Is this some kind of a self proclaimed, "i'm-proud-of-myself" week?

Hahaha... honestly, i'm really happy the way things are for the past 2 days. I actually got the hang of some Price Index shit. You afs might think i'm slow, but really, try to recall who my teacher was last year and who my current teacher is... i admit she's slightly better so yeah.. good shit... gonna head off to do my econs tys after posting... i'm shocked at myself.. Plus, i completed 2.4km without stopping!!! i have broken another personal record.. sometimes, i feel as if i'm a fuckin wuss.. omg....
Practical was another disaster though... i stained my skirt with some unknown chemicals... milk said it looked gross.. like wtf... x)
btw, bf and mo, i finally can comprehend on why you 2 are wearing pullovers EVERYWHERE... LT6 can literally freeze my ass off... Chua BB happily changed our LT from the spacious number 1, to the pathetic, stinky, small and fuckin ass cold, number 6... i think i'm gonna be one of you soon, having gp and math in the same ass lecture.. fuck! And i'm still upset over the fact that we aren't having the same mass pe anymore... i shouldn't have blogged it... everytime i do smth like that, it inevitably gets jinxed... now i have to run that stupid trail marathon BY MYSELF... while the rest of the world would be having a ball of a time, rolling down the pathetic slopes at that stupid reservoir.. no thanks to my disgustingly enthusiastic classmates for ASSUMING that everyone is enthusiastic enough to join the competitive group... i think they caught that lame syndrome from my retarded and blind econs teacher, who always assumes things and can't articulate well.. like, "any porbrem?" & " they have to maintain good relationships with the twade union...." SHOOT ME
I've never looked forward to pe this much, coz now the complete AF still in cj are having it together.. cuss the new timetable... i have mine on friday... i hope it rains, then the terrain becomes slippery, and i go back to school all muddy and stinky.. i'll be the second stinkbomb eh girls?! *private joke*
Okay.. enough said.. i'm heading back to my books... i'm gonna be so proud of myself after doing some questions from the tys... bloody teacher can't scold me for having a clean econs book!!!

*Strutting

I had a somewhat fruitful day on the average... I finally got down to work and finally accomplished my math tutorial!!! Damn pleased with myself.. now, i'm just waiting for year 2's lecture to start and perhaps, resume on my momentum... Read up on my Halogen Derivatives and Hydroxy Cpds... sorta have a rough idea on what's going on so i hopefully won't be lost in lectures.. i swear the lecturer can't lecture for nuts and he kinda give me the creeps... *shrudders*
Erm... vball today wasn't much of an accomplishment though... totally bummed ard the whole damn time, feeling ashamed of myself coz the j1s were like superb! like fantastically awesome.. and i was like, errr... shan't say... you can pretty much say that i am the worst of the j2s... to think that Marissa was lamenting on and on about how bad her skills were?! she's good!! really admire the fact that sucha demure girl can play vball with gentle strokes and swift hand moves that seems like she's dancing.. I'M IMPRESSED!I on the other hand, am so gonna get kicked out.. the coach said that next week, he'll do selections for the team and the j2s who cant make the cut shall leave.. he doesn't wanna see our faces no more.. muahaha.. .so bf, maybe i CAN go out with you on mondays and wednesdays!!! nonono.. lets limit outings to once a week.. i wanna study... i'm serious!!!!!!!
omg.. there's this seriously cute butch in vball!!!! but she's so argh!!! like when i was practising my serves, she just stood there and stared.... wtf... got distracted so i screamed at her saying, stop staring. She didnt bother.. continued with her nonsense.. she'll be the death of me, seriously...

Wrote this today after receiving this really fucked up sms.

Now that you're gone,
I'm standing here all alone,
Feeling desolated and lost.

No matter how far the distance between us,
You'll always have a special place reserved; right here in my heart.

No doubt I'll never truly forgive you,
Trust me on this,
You mean much more to me than what you actually see on the surface...
My faith in you was never lost.

No comments balls...everyone seems to be encountering with rs probs.. i've already found 5. still counting.. what's wrong with humans?!

*Falls on me

Little things that i see or encounter, makes me reminisce about the wonderful past...
Somehow, i can't seem to find the key to unlock the tangled chain bounding my heart.
I can only hope and wish that a miracle would happen, now that circumstances forbid certain things to be the way it should be.

*Emotional distress

Okay, I'm already feeling the bloody heat waves with all the teachers emphasising about how impt this year is and all, the incessant naggings about us having to do well in March's common tests so that it acts as an emotional booster for the A's.. I'm fuckin scared... Everyone already seems bloody geared up to fight this losing battle. Everyone but the AFs. Or so i think so.. Am i alone?
Having a changed econs teacher who can't fuckin teach isn't helping much either.. I know i have to rely on myself but really, at least make use of the time allocated during lectures and tutorials, instead of settling stuffs on CCAs.. there happen to be students who want to learn, and more so, its out A levels! I'm so not cut to do the arts. And econs is half an arts subject... goddamnit.. i should have chosen physics right from the start, knowing science is my forte. but wtf... its too late for regrets, isn't it? I've already gone thru one long year of sheer toture and i'm about to enter another learning phase. Sheesh... everyone seems to be doing well in econs. everyone but my class.. its the teacher, i tell you.. no matter how much one can say that learning relies on oneself, the teacher plays a major role too... I have a major catching up to do, with year 1 work and trying to understand wtf is going on during all the lectures.. I need a ventilator!!! I need to cut down on socialising from next week on.. I can't afford to spend time chilling out with my gfs. I don't want history to repeat itself anymore.
Feeling sleepy during lessons isn't helping either... and the fact that i've been doing so badly in school work just lowers my morale and confidence. I'm lacking sleep coz i'm faithfully doing my math homework every night till some un-godly hour and waking up early at 6 isn't doing me any good.. I got this damn feeling that i'm gonna snap really soon... I haven't even fully geared up for the bloody exams coz fear is embracing me. I'm worrying more than i ought to. Perhaps if i could like cut down the worrying and complaining...............................

*Seriously fucked.

I DESPISE FUCKIN TRANSVESTITES.. ESPECIALLY MAT ONES WITH MOTHER FUCKIN BIG BOOBS THAT SAG LIKE SOME FUCK SHIT WHEN THEY ARE ALREADY FAKE WITH SILICON IMPLANTED IN THEM.... FUCK SHIT PPL WITH IDENTITY CRISIS AND THINK THEY ARE SOME MOTHER FUCKIN BIG SHOT JUST COS THEY LOOK WEIRD... FUCK SHITS... JUST GET A FUCKIN LIFE.. LOW LIFE SCUMBUGS OF SOCIETY... MAT TRANS JUST PORTRAY THEIR IMBECILITY EVEN MORE SO WHEN THEY TRY TO ACT BIG... FORGOTTEN THEIR PLACE IN SOCIETY.. CAN NEVER MAKE IT BIG COZ THEY'RE MATS. EVEN WORSE SO WHEN THEY ARE MAT TRANS... as what yaosheng said, " what's worse than a trans? a whole group of them"... LIKE FUCKIN PIECES OF SHIT... I'M PISSED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

*Screw yourself

This is gonna be a relatively long entry coz i haven't been able to view any blogs, and hence affected my blogging mood.. i'm happy now though.. x)
Wed, 7 Jan
Ended school at 1230.. helped out at the volleyball booth, urged those j1s that i thought could make it to join.. walked around.. slacked at the grandstand and i bet i zhao geng-ed.. the wind was like STRONG! hahaha.. not the first time anyway... i need to borrow long skirts from Clara... hahahaha.. Stupid bf la... kept hurrying me to go town with her and Theresa coz we were supposed to go catch School Of Rock... so i reluctantly left school at about 230.. Guess what? the timing was ultra bad.. like 5! Apparently, all of us thought it was late coz we wanted to go home early.. Turned out that we slacked at Lido, had major eye opener *grins at bf and theresa*... then like this whole entourage consisting of Hansen, Claire, Szuyu and Alex, came... like whoaaaaa... imagine 7 ppl sqeezing onto the pathetic benches at Lido... so anyway, Hansen, Claire and Szuyu left coz they wanted to go shopping and asked us along.. all of us were too tired to move our asses though.. so the 4 of us sat there and talked alot till abt 8+... So much for going home early.. I bet if we caught the 5pm movie, i'll go home even earlier lah! basket.. hahaha.. not complaining coz the 3 of us had some new discoveries... Alex should have more of this care and share session with the 3 of us.. power!!! heh. Oh.. Claire was on the phone with Szuyu and i assume that Szuyu asked who was there and Claire was like, " Hansen, Alex and this other girl whom i dunno her name.. hahaah" Should have seen her sheepish smile.. bf and theresa left me to go toilet la.. thanks babes.. left me in the lurch, feeling like a major loser... whatever.. i had fun... too bad clara chose swimming over mo.. bad mo!!!
Today, had fucked up chinese lesson.. was supposed to write a compo on a fucked up topic which i have no idea why i chose... anyway, i couldn't complete on time, and what's worse.. lao shi said it was incoherent and she'll fail me.... i've never failed a zuo wen EVER... expt last yr.. it was my first attempt... wtf.. i told her like since i'm already failing, i might as well just hand up an incompleted work.. guess what was her reply? She said in mandarin but i'll translate; cannot!!! as the saying goes, if you lose your way, make a detour and find your way back.... Right.. how am i supposed to salvage that pathetic piece of work i wrote?! it's beyond "repair"... i gave a lame conclusion.. the lamest ever... "by taking note of one's personal hygiene, it'll make the world a better place to live in."
OMG... so fucktard eh? No points for guessing the topic... I was really ashamed of my slip shot work so i wrote a note at the end, " lao shi, dui bu qi, ke shi wo jing tian mei you ling gan xie zuo wen."
hahahha... so sure she's gonna scold me... but i love my lao shi... she's the best.. the whole of the AFs would agree...
And then, i dropped my favourite Fossil watch while rushing to the toilet to change!!!!!!!!!! Now the glass screen has two small holes.. small but majorly obvious... I'm damn upset... still damn upset about it.. How??? I hate being in a rush... i always forget to bring something along or i end up dropping things.. you can call me a klutz... urghhh
Mass PE was the ultimate.. i wouldn't consider it really tough but i thought they'd be kind to start slow..but NO... 5 rounds for everyone... i died. really.. at least i ran 4 and walked 1/2 a round.. i didnt' CHEAT!!! *3 cheers for me pls*
after that, whoa.. it was scary.. i really thought i'd throw up after doing like 5 sets of shuttle run, a zillion burpees which i didn't really do, abt 50 push ups and 50 sit ups/crunches and 20 sets of jumping jacks and 70 sets of supergirl and the usual many many stretches... wahahha... at least i had bf and mo with me.. that made me feel a little better.. so glad mo's doing pe again!!! I wish i had perspired more.. i don't feel like i've excercised enough... Next thursday.... I'm kinda looking forward to it... Oh... did i mention the complete AF are doing pe together? with the exception of fi and crystle that is...EVERYONE!!!! x) so ecstatic already..
aye aye.. i stink. no.. more like i STINK.. i'm gonna take a nice long bathe now... gonna attempt my long awaited P&C and read up my chemistry.. are any of you lost there? with Tan Kheng Hsin lecturing, i wouldnt be surprised...
Oh.. i think the j1s are like gross... so much for eye candies... i'm still looking.. erm.... i mean WE

*Changed personality?

Something's wrong with blogger... when i try to view any blogs, i get diverted to blogger... fuck.. oh well.. its not gonna dampen my mood...
I've just had the best 2 days ever.. Yesterday, the afs were just having a ball of a time at lido, laughing at stupid things we do and say, taking tons of pictures with steffie's camera and hiding from some sji bastard... mauhaahah... thanks bf! I think we create a commotion... everyone was looking at us coz we were laughing DAMN loudly... gave them the xialan face... hahahah
Today, it was basically slacking at scotts food court, chilling, statisfying my growing hunger for food with fried dumplings and tau suan.. *yum yum*... gonna eat ramen tmr with bf again.. and soon, our escapade to marina sq to indulge in sinful bak chor mee!!!!!
I'm getting excited.... oh my god.. and my weight is just sooo gonna increase... bloody shit... ate so much yesterday and took height and weight today... 50kg lah! tmd... lost 2 kg while working and now, i gained it back... what's worse... i had no stamina to finish 2 whole rounds without stopping! Gave up for the last 50m... i'm fucked for mass pe... majorly fucked!!! Clara happily went to sun tan with her cousin, leaving bf, theresa and i to venture... stupid mo... heh... guess who came later on and it became all drama-mama? Alex... those sji bastards are even more bastardised when they say, "you can call me a bastard, but don't get my school involved."
Oh yes, your alma mater... *rolls eyes* hahaha.. fucked up his school anyway, an enjoyable evening spent with my dearies and perhaps alex; for letting us make him the subject of dissing...
Not gonna waste anymore time... the tutorials are piling up and i am attempting to start DOING my chemistry!!!

*Never be the same

Its a miracle that i even made it to school, early! I was swarmed by stupid mosquitoes the whole damn night and i didn't actually get proper sleep till like 3+am... and before i knew it, my alarm clock rang...550am... time to wake up for school..
OK, so it was the usual bitching cum catching up with the past with Ulynn on the bus... and then upon reaching school, seeing so many erm.... shall i say, interesting faces? yup, anyway, got turned off so we went to slack at the canteen... Soon, the AFs turned up and yeah! BIG HUG!
Got a pleasant surprise coz i have a change in my home tutor which is the ultimate coolest!!! Its my chemistry and new GP teacher... no more Ms Cheng for the rest of my entire life in cjc... phew... slacked ard, talked abit, fret and whined a little when i realised that i didn't get the J block while the entire gang of the AFs and veron got it... minus ulynn that is... at least there's a freshly dug pong just outside my HUMONGOUS classroom... and yes...stupid Melvin and Alex are still trying to carry out their assasination...
Alex:" Eh... lets kill E'an now lah... throw her into the pond!!! *evil laugh*"
Melvin:" YAH HOR!!!Perfect opportunity!!!"
Me:" Bloody morons... the pond is dry and shallow, i won't drown..."
There... that's my imbecile classmates for you...
I would say the whole day was basically frivolous... muahaha... plus the fact that everyone seemed friendlier!!! heard that Moony is actually on good terms with chow yang, as seen by shaking hands... *shakes head*
Oh yah.. and then these 2 Cat. High guys were giving me this ultimate weird look when i gave Jin Wei a hug.... Erm... prob because such scenes weren't popular back in an all boys' school?! time to mature lah... heh x)
Saw alot of stc ppl, missed my classmates who got retained.. esp yy! hmph... Went out with the 5 fingers after school... Bloody awkward initially when we met each other... been one long year since we actually saw each other... After a while, slacking at Coffee Bean, i'm glad everyone finally got used to each other's presence... haha.. was laughing like no body's business when we were reminiscing about the stupid things we did way back in Sec 1 & 2... priceless i tell you....
To sum up the first day at school, it was great!!! Seeing all my gfs and those stupid guys... absolutely wonderful!!! The change in home tutor topped everything though.. wheeeeee

*Confused?

May the fleas of a thousand camels infest the ass of the person who fucks up your year and may his arms grow too short to scratch his ass! HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!
School's reopening tmr.. having mixed emotions about the whole thing. Not even sure if i'm mentally prepared for what i'm in for!!! Nvm.. no time to worry... I'll just take one step at a time. Like as if i can predict and foresee my future... BAH!
Talking about school, i haven't finished my holiday homework... How screwed can i ever get? I sense a mad rush when we have to hand in our assignments... I'll be the first to grab hold of Veron's hw... heheh...

I've been waiting for that very something, but it never did came. One day has flown past and i've yet to receive it. Should i torture myself by hoping and wishing that it'll come soon? Or should i just let go of it? You've changed so much... Now i feel as if i hardly know you. But some things will never change. No matter how long the duration is, they'll never change..................

By the way, my lame ass sister calls the song, I know what you want, by Busta Rhymes and Mariah Carey, the popcorn song.. claims that the rhythm sounds like the sound of making popcorns... she's a fucktard whom i love oh so much!!!!

*You still keeping it?